Ah.


lala. Learnt Javascript today.. And yeah I still haven't summed up the courage to talk to anyone. Blaez. Everyone's in cliques and all. I just feel outta place. What's worse is that I come home to a screaming frenzy. No, I'm not the one screaming. I've gotten over that already.
I don't scream. It's a waste of lung power when you scream at a stonehead. Yeah.. I'm starting to dread coming home. Okay lemme tell you something way interesting. My mom almost threw me out of the house. Wanna hear the dialogue? Background: I slept at one last night. Yeah, like so? And then she chased me out of the room. Threw all my blankets and my pillow out. ( I've got 3 blankies-- one of them's spongebob squarepants :P) And then said,"you want your independence right? Then get out of here!!" Oh well. I was tired. I don't give a damn. Just lemme sleep. So I said," I never said that." It's like she expects me to rebel. Okay, whatever. In my house, I'm labeled as the "hot-headed" one. Heck, I've changed. Can't she see that? Why is she so blinded by what I did before? It's not like I'm still taking drugs. (oops. I was NEVER taking drugs. She just behaves like I did.) And then I slept on the couch.
Next morning she was so pissed. She expected me to be angry again. I don't give a damn. So I woke up and I saw her ( I was sleeping on the couch in the living room) and I smiled huge "Good morning mom!" And she just glared at me like -how can you be so cheerful?- Okay so she ignored me the whole morning. Fine. I'm bloody used to it.

After school. (note: this is not the whole thing. I can't be bothered to write EVERYTHING down)
Mom: Okay you can take your stuff into the room. But if you sleep that late again..
Me: Mom, it's okay. You're gonna chase me out sooner or later anyway, so I'll stick to the couch (FYI I go chased out of my own room millions of times in singapore ever since she decided to conquer it).
Mom: You don't want to live here issit? then get OUT!
Me: I never said that I didn't wanna live here. I just said that I'll get used to sleeping on the couch. Why are you so angry? It's not like you didn't sleep late when you were in college.
Mom: If it's late because of homework then it's okay!! BUT YOU WERE CHATTING!
Me: Mom.. did you even look at me? I was..
Mom: Everytime you play play play on the com(blah blah blah screaming)
Me: Mom listen. I was DONG my homework. I was emailing my teacher. And then I read an email and decided to reply it.
Mom: Then why did you sleep so late? Is it normal to sleep at 3am?!
Me: I slept at 1. Before you threw me out at 1.30.
Mom: I ASKED YOU!! IS IT NORMAL TO SLEEP AT 3am??!
Me: I slept at one. You kicked me out. Besides, it was only for one night.
Mom: I WANT YOU TO SLEEP AT 10 AND WAKE UP EARLY!!
Me: okay, i will.
Mom: YOU DON'T WANT TO LIVE HERE ISSIT? THEN GET OUT!!
Me: I didn't say that. You're right. I should get up early. I understand.
Mom: YOU WANT TO BE INDEPENDENT ISSIT? THEN DO ALL YOUR CLOTHES YOURSELF! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE IF YOU DON't WANNA LISTEN TO ME! TALKING BACK ALL THE TIME!!
Me:(????? I just said she was right...) I said you were right.
Mom:(to my brother) AFTER YOU FINISH YOUR HOMEWORK THROW ALL HER STUFF OUT! SHE DOESN't WANNA LIVE HERE ANYMORE!!
Me: ( I was damn bloody pissed off already. had enough.) I DIDN'T SAY THAT!!

Golly. After that I asked my brother. Did I rebel? "no." Did I scream at her? "no." Did I disagree with her? "no." Was my tone implying something wrong? "no. Actually you sounded like you were not even arguing" THEN WHAT'S HER PROBLEM?! "She just expected you to talk back." And then she wants to confiscate the laptop. Ooo. So she wants me out of the house, and then she doesn't wanna send me to school, and now she wants to stop me from doing my homework. Whatever. And plus I don't have any money. I'll start working next quarter. A few days ago when I harboured the thought of living in a hostel, I wasn't thinking of independence. I just don't want to continue being misunderstood. I was the black sheep of the family. From the looks of it, I always will be.

"'why do you treat them so nicely? They're just little beings.'
'It's because they will die.'" I forgive. Why can't you forgive me?






On the lighter side, I'm eating a snickers bar!! Hee hee Mom was so nice to buy one for me ^__^ Ah I know she loves me lol! (oh like in the song i just wrote. At least I think she does. Or would like to think so. Nah she loves me. Maybe it's just mood swings. But what was her constant fascination to throw me out of the house? -____- dunno larh. whatever. As long as we keep living, good things will always come our way<-- Bellemere-san I'll just work to ensure my survival in case one day she really DOES kick me out of the house.) Oh I ate half of my snickers bar liaoz. I save half for tomorrow bah. haha! Everyday during math my tummy grumble like siao. So must fill up first haha! With snickers! Yum yum! Ahh got so much homework to do ~__~ I'll try to do next week's by this week so my mom won't scream again. ( not that she'll know anyway, the sooner I finish the more time I have to watch One Piece! But everytime i watch she scolds me ~__~ so regardless she'll still scold me. Blaez.)I have great news! We were told to write an outline of our essay and since I didn't think about it properly, I anyhow passup haha! And then mine was chosen as an example of the MOST VAGUE thesis statement lol! Kudos to non-serious work! Which means I'd better be gettin' serious or I wont get that A. Which needs 96% or higher. CAn someone tell me how the hell am I going to get an A for that?! And a few guys were staring at me today. Why arh? Maybe I chio :P har har har like real. But my bro said I dressed nicely today. o__O interesting. I thot I was looking bo chap again; after all I was feeling bo chap anyways. Anosan! Think that certain guy'll notice me? :P No larh I dont think he did. haha! He's prettier than me anyways. Wanna see can look at himself lol! Arh anyways, better be starting on homework.

"they'll all die one day"<-- from Armand. Anne Rice ( that's how you spell it right?)

|| Pinch me. || 8:48 PM

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