It's halloween so here's a story for everyone!! Haha..


The armpit hair chronicles


I have a secret which is not so secret. I know you have a secret too.

I know you have armpit hair.

"No!! IMPOSSIBLE! I DON'T!! WHATAREYOUtaLKINGABOUT?!"

Heh. deny all you want.


Because I know WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER NIGHT....
------------------

The armpit hair, a thick and protruding piece, was happily basking in the sweaty haven of your under arm..

"ahh what a nice day today.. the smell is great, and I have all my friends swaying in paradise with me..." the armpit hair said blissfully.

"yes yes" said his friend. "what a nice dark night.. looking at the waterfall of sweat and listening to it trickle.. on the beach of underarm skin.. what more can we have!!"

as they stretch lazily suddenly a bright light invaded their privacy.

"WHAT THE!! GET out OF MY WAY!! BRIGHT!!! SO BRIGHT!!"

"hey wait!" said his friend. Look look!!! What ugly things are those? So black and thick, they don't deserve to be on the underarmland!"

"you STUPID!" screamed the armpit hair, "THAT'S US!"

His friend blinked. "oh yeah.."

they found themselves staring face to face with the reflections of themselves. (somehow they have the brains to decipher that, but on with the story!)

Suddenly they heard screams. It sounded like a tsunami hit. ANd IT WAS GETTING cLOSER!!! "AHHH!!!" came the agonizing scream of the neighbour at the edge. "OMG WHAT'S HAPPENING?!" "NOOO!! NOT ME!! NOT ME!!! AHHhhhh....*silence*"

The armpit hair stared in wide eyed horror as the monster pincer came closer and plucked his neighbours out of their rightful place and dumped them into the white pit of hell (the sink). Your sink may not be white, just imagine it is for now.

Just two hairs away from him the monster pincher stopped, and the beige octopus pentagus controlling it put the monster down. "phew!"sighed the armpit hair. "NOO!!!" SUddenly there were desperate pleas and cries for help from down below. The armpit hair watched in solemn silence at the pentagus turned on the tap and unleashed a waterfall of sweat (the armpit hair thinks that the water is odorless sweat, since sweat is the only water it knows) unlike anything he has ever seen before "the sea is falling!!" his friend screamed and the armpit hair watched helplessly as all those he had once knew were washed away into the deep abyss.. some had tried to cling onto the roundness of the sink.. but it was all in vain.. the pentagus flicked them into the massive twirl of water (hey what's the tonardo under the sea called, I forgot.. ) and down down they went..

Now the armpit hair was terrified. This serial killer -- the pentagus!

The pentagus continued on its rampage! There was no escape!

It was coming coming!!!!




.
.

It WAS HERE!!

Looming above him was the pentagus pincer duo!! He scream as the pincer took him into his wide mouth and pulled! "PAK!" Just at the last minute the armpit hair used his last amount of energy and fought back! He pulled back, and was saved, with the pincer snapping him off just above the roots. Hidden in his little enclave slightly above the skin, he was safe for now..


But his friend was not as lucky..


















later that night the armpit hair trembled in his sleep, replaying the massacre in his head over and over again...


and he vowed to take revenge.


" I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST NIGHT." he mumbled to the pentagus in his sleep.

"YOU WILL PAY....."

and thus the armpit hair has haunted the underarm till this day, and it never goes away...







THE END!

|| Pinch me. || 12:54 PM

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[ disclaimer ]
any resemblance to the animated pet-like-things above to any person dead or alive is purely coincidental and an act of God, for it was not me who made them (person or pet) look that way. In any case, the author of this blog meant it as a joke and perhaps a sign of twisted affection. The author is also a bigot who talks in third person. *shrugs*
more coming soon when more than 5 people read this blog.

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